Erikk says:
if i told you an amazing orgasm inducing (women get orgasms from good flavours) drink would you walk over now and get one?
*megan* says:
i would if i coudl but ih ave katie and moms in bed so icant tell her to watch her
but i would as soon as i wake up
Erikk says:
French Vanilla with an Apple Cinnamon Teabag
wait
*megan* says:
mmmm
teabag
Erikk says:
text ur man to bring you one
*megan* says:
LMFAO
Erikk says:
HAHAHAHA
*megan* says:
omg i make me laugh
im almost crying
woooah easy drunky
now im responding to myself
does your google work?
mine says invalid request
Erikk says:
ahahah
*megan* says:
god is broken!
Erikk says:
“does your google work”
*megan* says:
LOL
Erikk says:
imagine travelling back to 1923 and asking someone that?
and yes
yes it does
*megan* says:
id invent google if i went back that far
even tho i dontk ow how internet works
it mkes me mad thinkign about it
or computers
tvs
phones
fack
id call google megatron though
and rename myself meganator
and breate the baconator
and everything that ends with anator
and atron
Erikk says:
or tron
*megan* says:
yes
megatron
Erikk says:
oh look a fagtron and his fagtronic handbag
*megan* says:
wait is that anthing
wait
i alreayd said id name googl that
fack im dense
LMFAO
i thought you said handlebag
and i laughed so hard
then i re-read
still funny though
Erikk says:
handlebag?
*megan* says:
yeah
is that not funny?
i thought it was
liek a purse
it has handles
i dont know
it sounds dumb now that i explain it
yet im still laughing
Erikk says:
hahahahahahahahah
lol im laughing at my teabag flopping around smacking me in the lips
*megan* says:
LMFAO
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
i cant drink tea with the bag in once it gets to teh end
cause hte teabag flaps me in the mouth
and its familiar
and amusing
and for the same reason - i have a very hard time fucking men with huge balls
Erikk says:
lol
*megan* says:
doggy style in particular
cause their bag hits me
at an alarming rate
and makes a whap sound
that sends me into a fury of laughter
“at an alarming rate” now im picturing it
as if it was hitting me liek a brick
WHAP!
it makes that noise though
the alarmingly fast noise
im”whap”ing out loud
and flicking my wrist
in a slapping the ass during doggy style manor
pretending its balls
whapping my
whatever they whap
ooooooouuuuuccccch
theres a burn on my finger
i forgot t happened
util i stopped masturbating
then i took my finger out of my vagina
and WHAP
the pain hit me liek a shit brick house
“pssst.. moron.. you have a severe burn on that finger”
IM SO FUCKING DUMB
im moving left o right in my chair
like swinigng side to side
i donno what word ud use for that
TURNING
anyways
every time i went right i heard this noise
that soudned a lot like ahungry stomach
and im hungry
so i was like
wtf
every time i go right, my stomasch growls
what impecable timing
theni realized it was actually the chair making that noise
!!! POST # 100!!! WAY TO GO MEGAN!!!!
katie today
“Hey mom.. youk now what P is for?”
“What?”
“P is for PECKER!!!!”
after much dying on the floor in laughter, i found out she was talking about a WOODpecker.. as in the bird
“The pecker that pecks at wood like this..” *starts bobbing her head like shes giving a blowjob* “Peckers that pecker at the trees with their pecker noses. Pecker Pecker” *more head bobbing*
I fucking diiiieeeed
the mroe she said pecker the more i laughed, the more i laughed the more she enjoyed it and kept saying pecker
*megan* says:
LOL midgit in jail
Erikk says:
?
*megan* says:
still watching some stupid jail show
about ppl getting arrested
i donno why
its not amusing
except hte midgit who just got arrested
the rest was just all drunk people
Erikk says:
hahahahhaha
yes
*megan* says:
they dont show u them getting arrested, or tell you what happens
its jsut checkign them into jail
wtf
what a pointless show
minus hte midget
hes mxican too
or
maybe native
i cant tell
maybe neither
im nogood with that colour
i think native
even though is aid mexican first
lol
its cuz heh ad a stache
and was dark
which makesm e assume mexican
not a full stache though
like an almost one
like a lot of mexicans i see
watching this show about life in jail - its women right now, not sure if it always is never seen it before, but hot dog the last 2 are fkn sexy - prison isnt scary anymore
loves it
you want to hear a really funny story my friend told me christmas eve, about me, that i had no idea about until he told me
and it happened in the summer
we go out drinking, he pays - cause he always does when i go out - and then i get tipsy. we go to his boss’ party and i spend most of hte time playing wii with the kids there, drinking wine, getting obliterated. go figure.
we decide to go to his place (said friend)
i decide we should fuck, already knowing we were going to cause we were groping before we even lefth te party
well okay, i was rubbing on his pants
cause he grabbed my ass
anyways
i decide to get nakedi n the truck on the way there to save time
were out of town, dont even leave the town were in and im already naked
so were driving back to town
cop sees me naked and shuffling all over the front seat of his truck
my side, his side, the middle
all over
one of those seats - whatever theyre called
anyways, cops coming towards us, so he pulls a U and turns around
assuming im ass naked
which i am, but i put my pants back on before he got to the window to really know
so im hanging out
literally
titties are out
laughing
smoking
acting like shits all gravy
he comments on my being topless
i comment on how its now legal
he gives a hesitant touche but you should be more respectful of yourself speech
because my top is off, doesnt notice that my seatbelt is too
or just didnt care to say anything
so - double win for me
so we get to buddys house fnially - i run out of his truck naked
not even shoes on
naked
cause i got naked again when the cop left i guess
leavge my clothes IN the truck
and run towards his house
we get tot he door, hes stumbling with the keys so he makes me wear his coat
so his neighbours dont see im naked
we get in
i dance for him a bit
blow him
fuck him
blow him some more
tell him i need to pee and get up before hes done
i pee
with the door wide open - so he has full view of me on the pisser
me acting like its nothing
come back, tell him i definitely need to get back to the bar cause i have people waiting
so, he chases me otuside and covers me with his coat again
so the neighbours dont see
since my clothes are still in the truck
and i dont get dressed again until hes parked right out front of hte bar im going to (the one we started in, go figure)
talk about hilarious and i wish i remember
i remembered running naked back to his truck after the slam session
but i wasnt sure if i wasn aked or not
and i remembere he cop commenting on my tatas
but thats all
i kind of assumed it was one of those moments id wanted to be naked, but just ddnt bother doing it
boy was i wrong all this time
my life rocks
and by summer i meant spring
and by spring i mean it was still effin cold at night
and there was snow on the ground
not lots
like
the odd patch of ice i guess
what a scene
im so awesome
im a girl
i get free drin offers all over hte place
its hard neough to say no to booze im paying for
but FREE
never
i could be vomiting and still take a free shot
cause its free
every time i say im gonna go out n not get loaded
cuz im broke
i end up 100x mroe drunk than i do night i pay for it
Erikk says:
ahaha thats why you say NO
*megan* says:
this is me we are talking about
if its at a bar or a club, and its offered, i take. even if i just threw up. even if i just recieved a concussion from fighting someone because im drunk and beligerant. even if im so drunk i just blew someone in the bathroom who i despise.
if its free, you always tkae
worst case i threw it up, and i didnt fkn waste a cent on it so i dont feel bad throwing it up
my logic is skewed
i dont know when too much is too much
because by then ive blacked out
im only a good judgement drinker when im at a house or a restaurant
lol
or outside
something about the loud music and dancing and all the slutty girls i want to punch out and the ******* who grab my ass - really makes me get out of hand
I donno what’s worse - getting laid and not remebering, or not getting laid at all
lmao
they both suck
even more so when i know it was like, if i drank 3 less i woulda got laid AND remembered
buuuut im a lush
and i cant stop until i dont know my name
i need a non bar place to drink
Mexican Avalanche: Cum in her face and then shove her down a flight of stairs.
LMAO
wtf
going out to felate my boyfriendo n the porch, brb
{long novel msn spurge from megan follows:}
lolololo my convos are horrrible with everyone
Friend:
I’ve totally raped my facebook today
I think it’s time to go to a bar and the same to a girl’s dignity…hopefully they got drunk on their own…
Me:
i def think you should do that
rape her of her dignity and fuck her in the ass while youre at it
ooh shit
he said dignity
nvm
still made sense
i need a hot beef injection
Audio post - Played 0 times
[Flash 9 is required to listen to audio.]The ringtone set for Megans texts. Well suited
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